I like this saying. We do worry about what people think of us - it's natural. But, if you accept the statement above as truth, you must accept that we are being "busy bodies" when we even try to figure out what people think of us. I hereby decide to stay out of the business of what others think of me.
A friend recently said "I guess I don't need EVERYONE to like me." Great statement. I have adopted it. I hope you like me. I will try to be nice to you, but I truly don't need everyone to like me. We can move on now.
I hate gossip. I really hate malicious gossip. I truly try to not talk about other people in a negative way. I have a whole list of faults and failures. I don't have any room to judge people or to air their faults and failures.
When you live in a small town, you have to learn the connections. Everyone is connected. Failing to know the connections can be disasterous. Keep in mind that not only do you need to know who is related to who, who is married to who, and who works for who. You also need to know who was previously married to who. Best bet - don't talk about anyone - listen alot! Small towns are wonderful places to feel valued, but you don't want to "step in it" by talking about somone's family! To quote the great philosopher Miranda Lambert - Everyone dies famous in a small town. (See earlier post for more on Miranda Lambert).
Do you believe "What people think of you is none of your business?"
Tina
Very true. The connections are the most difficult thing to establish. Unfortunetely I do care very much what people think of me which is why I voluntarily live alone. I never dislike someone until they expressed dislike in me. I basically am like a mirror and reflect how people treat me. If they treat me nice, I'm nice to them, if they treat me bad, then I just don't talk to them.
ReplyDeleteThe big towns are fun, but if you have a small town with everyone you know in it and they're all your friends, what's the point of living elsewhere? You can feel lost and lonely in large towns, and you can get bored in small towns.
When I first started the ink washes last year, I was drawing what I though to be really awesome places to draw. After every drawing, I would show it to people and they'd be like, "why did you draw THAT place? Don't you KNOW about THAT place?" After about...oh 6 or so drawings I finally just said, "Ok, you gotta tell me all the BS that happened with everything in this town before I draw ANYTHING else!"
My favorite ink wash drawing I did was the drawing with Anna sitting at a picnic: http://www.blueadeptart.com/pages/inkwashes.html Its the 4th from the left. I LOVE that building, I think its AWESOME, and if I had the money to get it fixed up and buy it, I would LIVE in that building. When I first visited here that was the ONLY building in all of Moultrie I remembered, and I wanted to do a nice drawing for my girlfriend so I drew her in front of my favorite building!
Turns out later I found out the past of that building and how it used to be the lifeblood of Moultrie and then the plant shut down and its a sore reminder of "the good times." Everyone that saw it had some horror story to tell me about how that plant messed up their family's history and how much they hate the building and the only reason its still standing is because they don't have money to remove it.
I also did a commission for a person downtown of his store and I drew the store beside his into the drawing as well. As it turns out, though he was in a lawsuit with the other store and I knew nothing about it!
But, yeah, in a small town, you gotta watch what you say, and you gotta watch what you do. You just never know.
Your thoughts on a small town are so very, very true...I learn more and more "connections" every day!
ReplyDeleteI believe that what I think of other people is more important to me than what they think of me. I've never been someone who wanted to be friends with everyone. I reserve the right to dislike someone and I fully respect their right to dislike me (misguided though they may be). ;) So, I guess my answer to your question would be "Yes." People are free to like or dislike me as they will. I can't control it or predict it, so it's best that it's none of my business. ;)
ReplyDeleteI do believe what people think of me is none of my business. What is my business is the way I live my life,the way I act and what kind of examples I set. If all of the above is good then we're all in good business.
ReplyDeleteGreat writing Tina.